I have never really been a "rides" person. When I was 16, Matthias and I went to West Edmonton Mall. I had never been on a roller coaster before, so Matthias made me try it out. We waited in line for 30min, and right before we got on they shut the ride down to do their hourly service - easing my nerves a little bit. Well we got on the ride, and started out. Up, up up, until we were near the top of the building, you couldn't see past a certain part of the track, because that's where it fell off and descended. As we neared this area, my nerves kept creeping up, up up. You know how they take the picture of you? It would have been a good one to buy - Matthias is looking like he is having the time of his life, I, on the other hand, have my eyes glued shut and this look of terror glued to my face. I cried when I got off the ride. I was so terrified. The feeling was NOT fun to me.
During that summer we went to Calaway Park just outside of Calgary. We both felt sick after the spinning strawberries, agreeing that spinny rides weren't for us. Matthias enjoyed the roller coaster there while I watched. I had a panic attack on the Log/Water ride, and tried climbing out of the moving ride at the top of the hill. Not my finest moment.
Fast forward 5 years. There is a neat little carnival in the Parkland Mall Parking lot. A great idea for a date night, right? I thought so! We got the carnival on Friday and bought some tickets. Which rides would we get on? We decided the Ferris wheel would be a good start. That was until, 5 minutes after waiting to get on, 2 skimpy dressed girls lined up behind us. The carnie stopped the ride and let them get on ahead of us. Seriously? We decided not to get on the ride because that guy was clearly a douche. The zipper looked innocent enough - people were getting on/off when we started lining up so we didn't see how fast it actually went.
The carnie put us on the ride (not in the barf basket lol) and strapped us in. The basket rocked back and forth, and I instantly regretted getting on. The hyperventilating started. Oh no. What had I done? The ride started. As did the screaming and yelling.
Here are some of the things I yelled out during our seemingly never ending ride:
- Oh god. I am going to die.
- This is it. This is the end of my life.
- Why is his music so loud? It's to block out my f*c&ing screams.
- Why did I do this?
..... We paused for a brief moment at the top. My entire body was vibrating - my legs, hands, butt, evertyhing - I was crying. Matthias said: It's okay, we are almost done, hold my hand. I yelled back "I can't let go, I am holding the cage door closed." Of course, the cage door was closed from the outside but I literally was pulling the door towards me. .......
- Oh no, We are going again.
- I don't want to die. I just want to nurse.
- I didn't even get to get married.
- I want off. I want off so bad.
- And finally: I leaned forward as we were going around the bottom and yelled at the top of my lungs at the Carnie: I WANT OFF. NOOOOOOWWWWWW. - Thank god he heard me this time and obliged.
Matthias said he wished he could have taped me. Hands down, we would have won America's Funniest Home Videos. He said My eyes were glued shut, my sunglasses would lift off my head as we went down, and my legs/arms/entire body were flexed.
It was one of the worst moments of my life. I was so terrified. I hated the spinning feeling. The never ending round and round. I felt my butt lift off the seat when we would spin, and there were times we stayed upside down for what seemed like minutes at a time.
I got off the ride and burst in to tears again. My whole body shook. I kept bursting in to tears every 5-10min for an hour after. I was so so so scared.
Matthias said the people -ahem kids- in the cart across from us looked terrified because of my never ending screaming. I literally screamed even when we were stopped.
Matthias and I both felt nauseous when we got off the ride. I didn't want to do any other rides. I wanted to leave. We gave our left over tickets to a group of kids (we hadn't even used half of them - we only did the one ride), and went and rented some movies. To settle our tummies I convinced Matthias that Menchies was the only way. Yum. At least one good thing came out of the terror.
So. Matthias said that in 5 years when I wanted to try out a ride, he wouldn't let me. Thank goodness he is so thoughtful.
I am not a rides person. Do you like rides?